Where do we go...

The question that has been asked a billion times already, maybe the only thing that living will never truly know. 

I know you are gone; so why, then, do I feel you everywhere. 

I see you smile as clear as if you are standing right infront of me, yet when I open my eyes you are not there. 

I hear your voice as if you are right at my shoulder, yet I turn around and you are not there. 

How is it that everything reminds me of you… is it because you are everywhere, or is it because you are somewhere within my soul. 

When we die, do our souls stay intact, or do they break into tiny pieces, and float on the wind as if tiny grains of sand, landing on things around your body as it departs. Does it magnetise to the things or people in this lifetime that it loved the most? Is that why all your favourite people, and favourite things, remind me of you?

Or maybe we just spread out into everything, just that all things that remind me of you are beautiful - because you were. Maybe you are everywhere, or maybe you are no where, and it’s just my mind putting you where you belong: with me when I need you, or flying high on wings of a bird at others. 

Whatever the answer, maybe I don’t want to know, I might be happy with telling myself you are always with me. As if I could carry you in my pocket, just as easy as getting ready for the day, you are placed on my wrist, or tucked in my bag, as I head out for the day. When the day gets hard - I know you’re just there, waving and giving me a smile.

Alayna Rennie-Cook - July 2026